


I'm Here

by AlexandriaArlene



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-20
Updated: 2015-02-20
Packaged: 2018-03-13 23:50:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3400748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexandriaArlene/pseuds/AlexandriaArlene
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clary and Jace are both handling the events from COHF differently. Clary's bottling up her feelings and Jace is hunting every night with Alec. Clary and Jace need to find a way to meet in the middle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Here

"I'm going demon hunting with Alec." Jace said as Clary sat on the couch in their apartment drawing. Clary didn't want him to go. She just didn't believe him when he said that he was going to come back anymore. He had gotten reckless and that scared her. He had never been like that before but now he was and she couldn’t stop him even if she tried she couldn’t.

"Fine." Clary snapped. She was tired of pretending that everything was okay when it wasn't. He was always hunting and she slept three hours at the most. The nightmares were overwhelming but he didn't know. He went hunting and then he wouldn't come home until she was asleep or when she was pretending to sleep because she didn't want to talk to him about the nightmares.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jace asked sending her back to why she was hiding her feelings about his demon hunting and her nightmares. Her and Jace were falling apart and she had to stand and watch it pass by because she couldn't handle all of her feelings so she bottled it up.

"Nothing." Clary said as she got off the couch, passed by him, and put her art stuff down on the table in the kitchen. Jace was getting frustrated with her because she was making snarky comments and he didn't understand or even know what she was thinking. Her initial protest to talk to him had gone because she had lost her nerve to follow through with everything.

"Why can't you just talk to me?" Jace said as she looked surprised. She didn't expect him to say anything back. She expected him to walk out the door like he did the last time they had tried to talk about this. Clary then realized how could he ask her that when he’s the one that had not been able to talk to her.

"You're reckless and you going hunting every single night scares me. You don't come home until 1 most nights." Clary yelled. She realized that she had no room to talk but she needed him and he wasn't there at night. It tore her apart to have those nightmares.

"Have I ever gave you a reason to think that I can't kill demons and still come home every night. Have I ever done anything to make you think that I wasn't going to come back?" Jace yelled. Clary shook her head. He scared her on how reckless he had become but he was Jace and yeah it was possible but Jace had beat death so many times. It seemed like nothing bad would ever happen to him but things can happen clary realized.

"That's not the point." Clary yelled at him and that's when Jace realized that something more was going on with her. He had been so busy hunting demons he didn't realize that she wasn't coping with what had happened. She was bottling it up and he was killing any demon that he could find.

"What's wrong?" Jace yelled as Clary turned away from him to go to their room. Clary wasn't expecting that and she turned around."I'm going demon hunting with Alec." Jace said as Clary sat on the couch in their apartment drawing. Clary didn't want him to go. She just didn't believe him when he said that he was going to come back anymore. He had gotten reckless and that scared her. He had never been like that before but now he was and she couldn’t stop him even if she tried she couldn’t.

"What?" Clary asked in shock and that's when she realized that he figured out what was going on inside her head. She wanted to not think about it but he could see what was going on inside her head and she didn't want to tell him.

"What's wrong?" Jace asked again but she didn't want to answer him. He should have known what was going on with her but he wasn't here when she cried. She missed Amatias and it made things hard for her.

"Maybe if you were here half the time that you spend hunting you would know." Clary said and Jace realized that she wasn't going to tell him right now and he didn't have time.  
"Clary, I love you but I have to go." Jace said and he kissed her goodbye. She didn't want him to go. She felt bad about the remarks that she had made toward him but it didn't matter anymore.

"Okay." Clary replied even though she did want to finish this conversation. She was just really angry with him in that moment. Jace walked out the door and knew that she was hurting. He figured that it had to do with what they had been through.

Jace walked into the apartment and the lights were off. He took his jacket and shoes off. He then pulled off the weapons he was wearing in the living room. He made his way to the room where Clary was sleeping. He made sure that he was quiet enough so that she couldn't hear him because he didn't want to wake her up. He pulled his shirt and his pants off. He crawled in the bed with her after demon hunting with Alec. He came home late almost every night since they had come back from the realms of hell. Clary was asleep most the time when he came home.

Some nights she had waited for him to come home. The room was dark but he could see the outline of Clary's body as she slept. He thought that she would have waited for him tonight but knew if she didn't that it was because she was exhausted. Isabelle had been responsible to train her today and she made Clary work harder than anybody else.  
"Jace." Clary gasped and she rolled towards Jace. He realized in that moment that she was having a nightmare and it was about that night when she was giving herself up to Sebastian for him. He knew because the way she said his name like it was killing her to say it. Jace pulled her against his body. She opened her eyes and felt as the tears burned in the back of her head.

"It's okay. I'm here." Jace told her. She put her head in his chest until he pulled her so they were looking at each other. Jace remembered the first time that he'd seen her green eyes. She was different than other shadow hunters because she didn't have to live with the training. She got to live a normal life for a little bit. He'd fallen in love with her because she was willing to fight for the people she loved. Valentine had raised him to think love was weakness but Clary taught him that love was strength because it gave you a reason to fight. It tore him up inside to think about the fact that she was in pain because of Sebastian.

"I love you." Clary whispered and he pulled her tightly but gently. He had always been gentle with her but she made him feel a sense of security when they were together. He had never had that before he met her. He was always afraid of losing the lightwoods as his family. He knew that Clary and him would last because they had always been able save each other. It hadn't been he was always saving her or she was always saving him. They had saved each other. He kissed her, that made her feel safe and like that, battle with Sebastian was over and something she wouldn't ever have to face again. He pulled away from her to say those three words.

"You know you look beautiful when your hair is a mess." Jace said. He hated when he hair was up but he like it when it was down. It was cute when she wasn't wearing make-up and he hair was all over the place to him. Clary felt as the heat rose to her cheeks and she blushed. She looked down and he knew that she needed that right in that very moment. It gave her something to think about other than the realms of hell. Clary pulled the blanket from the other side and cover herself and Jace with it.

It was black and felt warm on her. Jace ran his hand up and down her back making her feel secure and like he was going to be there when she woke up. It made her feel like now everything was going to be okay. Like her brother, dying wasn't hurting her. He did terrible things to her but when he died, she saw the good in him. She didn't see the monster that Valentine had created. She saw the brother that she should have had.

"Jace, I'm sorry about earlier." Clary told him and he knew that she was. She shouldn't be though because she had every right to get angry at him. She was a mess because she needed him and he wouldn't even acknowledge that's what she needed.

"Don't be. When you are not okay tell me. I just want to make you happy and you are hurting. I haven't been there for you and for that I'm sorry." Jace told her. Clary kissed him telling him that he shouldn't worry about it. Clary knew that they both have to deal with what had happened and that it wasn't going to be easy for anybody. Clary put her head on his chest as he ran his fingers through her hair. It was the first night that Clary felt like she could sleep and wouldn't wake up screaming. It didn't feel like Jace was a million miles away anymore.

“Don’t let go.” Clary let out and Jace looked at her in surprise. He was never going to let go of her. Someone would have to hunt him down and kill him in order for him to let go.  
“Don’t worry about that. I’m never letting you go.” Jace replied and that’s when Clary realized that she couldn’t have asked for anybody better to be with. Even though both of them were struggling she knew that they had to make it through. 

“Jace, we have to find away to get through this.” Clary said after a few seconds of silence and she was right they did needed to find a way and they always had. After everything he was going to make sure that they got through this.

“Clary, look at me. We will get through this because we always have been able to get through everything and this isn’t going to be the end because I love you more than anything else.” Jace told her and pulled her into a soft kiss. It was filled with passion and all the fear Clary was feeling. All Jace wanted to do is kiss all her pain away. Jace was willing to do everything in his power to make all her sadness go away. They both pulled away at the same time and he noticed that she was wearing his shirt. He felt himself smirk because she had finally felt comfortable enough to take them without asking. She had finally knew how much he loved her. She loved him just as much. Now they were there wrapped up in each other’s arms when they both fell asleep.


End file.
